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Toby’s Birth Story
By Carla Moore
It was a rainy, stormy night in the middle of June. Inside, the oils were burning, soft music playing, heaters cranking – the scene was perfect – for either making love, or having a baby!!
After having had an uncomplicated hospital birth with Abe, 23 months earlier, I was very keen on having this baby in an environment wherein we could feel totally relaxed and let nature do its thing. Deano took a little more persuading – frightened by the ‘what ifs’ and everybody else’s horror stories that they are always so willing to share as due date looms closer! However, a chat with our very capable midwives (Jan and Jan), and some reassurance from me that I would agree to transfer if either one of us felt at all uneasy at any time, was all it took to start feeling excited about the prospect of welcoming our little person into the world, at home, and hopefully in the water.
Five days before the due date, I woke up with period-like cramps – which I had already had three times in the past three weeks – but felt pretty sure that today was the day. Not wanting to cry wolf again, I kept it pretty quiet, and by 11am when things were still happening, I started quietly potting around getting Abe’s bag packed for him to go and have a holiday with Gran and Grandad, and getting all the ‘stuff’ ready and laid out. I was feeling exceptionally calm and clear and really ready.
We filled the pool at 2pm, which was a tricky decision – needing it to be 38-39 degrees for the baby to be born in. We filled it at 40 degrees (using our wonderful new infinity gas hot water system, with dial up temperature, and constant hot water!!), and covered it. At 4pm both our parents were around for coffee’s, which I happily made, as sitting chatting wasn’t exactly what I felt like. By now I was having pretty gentle, regular contractions, about 4–5 minutes apart. It was lovely to then say goodbye to Abe as he naively leaped out the door getting into ‘Gran’s car’ to ‘go for holiday at Gran’s place’ – no idea that his life would never be the same again!!
Deano and I then had lovely quiet time just with ourselves – no building, painting, people popping in – just us – this had become a bit of a novelty unfortunately! I had phoned Jan leaving her a message that she may have some work to do tonight so not to go making too many hot dates, but I phoned her again at 6pm saying that I was ready for her to call in sometime soon. I was still feeling too good – knowing that things had to get a lot more uncomfortable before this baby would arrive. I had my caulophylum ready for me to tuck into, to encourage this baby to make his way out, but I wanted Jan to check me first, and to be here if I chose to take it.
The Jan’s arrived around 6:30 ish to find me almost apologetic for possibly getting them here too soon – as I knew I still felt too good. I was happily surprised when Jan told me I was 6cm dilated. We decided to break my waters, hoping that this would encourage a bit of action too! I then hopped in the pool, more for the sake of it than anything else – perfect evening for a hot swim in the lounge! But this slowed things down even more, so I had to get out.
I then decided I was really keen to have this baby, and didn’t fancy hanging around all night, so I took the caulophylum, and Deano and I retreated for a little ‘nipple stimulation’ – under midwives’ orders! Within about 10 minutes I was definitely feeling a lot more like I was going to have a baby!! It was about 7:30pm by now. Between contractions we still were having lots of laughs and generally having really special time together, until about 8:30pm when things heated up. I shifted into the bathroom, where I planted myself firmly on the loo for the next 30 minutes – remembering how much I hated this bit! The Jan’s were quietly chatting in the lounge, leaving us totally to ourselves, but were no doubt totally tuned in to the noises I was beginning to make!
About 9pm they suggested we might want to start moving out to the pool again. One push outside the pool, and then I climbed in with Deano – once he’d put on the café del mar c.d. to which Abe was also born. The pool was 39 degrees – you beauty! I lay with Deano under me/supporting me, while I held onto the sides, making all sorts of primitive sounds right in his ear! The water was really calming, and felt so right to be giving birth in it. Lovely to be able to be so close to Deano too – like he was really going through it with me. Jan was reaching over the sides, gently encouraging me and giving me updates, along with the other Jan, who was also holding a mirror for us.
At 9:17pm Toby Russ Moore Larsen swam into the world. I felt so in love with him immediately – which I hadn’t felt with Abe. I didn’t feel at all sore, comforted by the water no doubt, and instantly forgot the pain I had just been through. We had hoped to let Toby have a little swim under the water, but my hips were up too high, bringing him to the surface. I tried to feed him while he was still hooked up to me, in the water. This was a nice idea – but not so practical, as he took on a bit of water, and started to get too cold. The cord was snipped in a jiffy and he was out to be suctioned and dressed by Jan. The placenta came away really easily, much nicer than last time, and plopped to the bottom of the pool.
Ten minutes later, I was in my yellow fluffy p.j’s snuggled up in bed, sipping on a hot blackcurrant drink, with Toby snuffling away on my boob. Meanwhile, the Jan’s and Mum, who had turned up within a few minutes of his birth, had cleared away any signs that a baby had just been born. Our lovely midwives then snuck out as unobtrusively as they had been the whole time, once we were all in order, leaving us to our own bliss. Toby was so wide-eyed, and lay in his bed close to us, looking around at his new world, so calmly and looking totally peaceful.
I raved about my first birthing experience, figuring I was really lucky and well guided – but this time was way lovelier. It felt as though Deano and I had done it all ourselves, and that it was all such an amazingly natural process. Of course, Jan and Jan had been so well organised and calmly confident, that they were easily able to support us unobtrusively and totally empower us to ride with this amazing experience. I pushed when I felt like it, and had a rest when I felt like it – all my pre-conceived ideas about ripping heinously if I was to push at the ‘wrong’ time were thankfully unfounded!
The true testimony to our birth experience is that we can already talk about ‘the next time’ and that there’s no way I’ll be going anywhere near a hospital if there is no reason to! We are SO lucky!!
Carla Moore and her husband Dean Larsen came back to their home town, New Plymouth, to raise their family in 2000, after travelling extensively for four years. Carla has an M.A. in Educational Psychology and Deano an Honours degree in Ag. Science. Along with their sons Abe and Toby, and now baby Annie, they love living by the coastal walkway where they ride, run, play and hunt for crabs. As well as being very involved in Playcentre and Active Birth Taranaki, Carla is also a consumer representative on the Midwives Review Committee.
Max’s Story… a New Beginning
By Sue Horton
It was a sunny Saturday afternoon. Lunch had been cleared away, visitors had departed, and a buzz of industry settled over the house again, as construction on the extension continued.
It was 2.00 pm and I was ambitious to dust, as the plasterers had recently sanded and fine white powder covered everything. But first, I decided to take a 30-minute rest before tackling the living rooms. I was experiencing ‘Braxton Hicks’, as I had daily over the last week or two, though they never developed into anything regular.
This time, however, during one of these contractions an almighty ‘punch’ hit me in the lower abdomen, and for a moment I wondered if the baby was under distress. Another contraction followed, and I decided that I’d had enough of lying down. But before I could reach the bathroom, my track pants were saturated down to my ankles. My waters had broken. The time had finally come. Now, I just needed to delegate that dusting, get rid of the decorators, and ensure that my husband was ready to start filling the birthing pool!
I was so excited. We had been waiting for this baby for almost fifteen years. Having started our family in my early twenties, I was now 38 years old and more than conscious of my age, and the ever widening gap since the births of my other children. I couldn’t afford to put it off any longer. After enduring nine tedious months of morning sickness and packing on a considerable amount of weight, I longed for the baby’s arrival.
Our two girls, now 15 and 17, were born in small country birthing centres and were delivered by our GP. My first labour lasted over 24 hours, after which I delivered a 61b 7oz baby girl. My second labour brought with it a 2 ½ hour second stage, due to a posterior delivery, resulting in our second daughter being born, weighing 71b 4 oz. While they were both fairly traditional births (delivered on my back on a hospital bed), I still thought of them as positive birth experiences.
This time we had decided to be pro-active and pursue a home water-birth… something I had never considered with the older two as we lived in fairly remote areas at the time. Now living in town, the option of transferring to a hospital, should the need arise, gave us that little bit of extra confidence to have our third little one at home.
By 4 o’clock I was in established labour. The contractions were intense from the onset, as the cushion of amniotic fluid had gone. I had managed to fold some washing, in between visits to the toilet and kneeling on the floor against our bed. It was a rather messy operation though, every time I had a contraction more fluid would leak out, so I went through lots of clothes before resorting to wearing a dress and kneeling over a towel!
My midwife arrived and assessed my progress, then gave me something to help empty my bowels… hey, anything to get this baby out faster! It was becoming more and more difficult to return from the bathroom as standing and walking brought the contractions on hard and fast. Around 6.30 pm I started feeling a little nauseous and needed some relief from the intensity of the labour. It was time to get in the pool.
The portable pool we had purchased was perfect to labour in. Leaning into the large cushioned sides, Clayton and my midwife, Carol, poured warm water over my back as I breathed through each contraction. I felt my body move effectively from the first to second stage of labour, as my uterus began to force the baby’s head down through the cervix into the birth canal.
Within an hour, my 91b 5oz boy was delivered and I lifted him up out of the water where he gazed inquisitively around the room that he was conceived in. His dad ran out to fetch the girls, announcing the arrival of their brother, and, as young Max exercised his lungs for the first time, his sisters, the cat and the dog (breaking his chain in the excitement) raced to the bedroom to celebrate the new arrival.
The placenta delivered an hour and ten minutes after Max’s birth, giving the girls a special time to bond with their baby brother. By 9.00 pm I was showered and tucked up in bed.
My weight and measurements throughout the pregnancy had indicated a big baby, and this was confirmed by a late scan. Being advised that I shouldn’t go past my due date, I had spent the last week or two trying every natural course of action I knew about to encourage the labour to begin. Yet I had reached the end of those options (four days past my due date) with a quiet peace that if I were to be given a 10lb baby, I would also be given the ability to deliver him safely and naturally at the right time. This quiet trust had proven true, as I experienced an uncomplicated delivery, requiring no ‘repair’ work, and, in the days to follow, experienced a remarkably quick recovery - something I attribute to the relaxing effect of the warm water during the later stages of the labour and delivery.
A frightening percentage of women who attended my ante-natal and aqua-natal classes experienced medical interventions, from induction to caesarean section deliveries. This made me even more grateful that I had trusted my body’s ability to birth naturally and safely into a welcoming and secure environment.
Max is doing well, and the smile on his face when he takes a bath tells me he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way!
Sue lives in New Plymouth with her husband Clayton and daughters Rebekah and Sarai. Clayton operates a landscaping construction business and Sue is a freelance writer.
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